This was it, no going back.

Cloaked in a gown of starlit velvet sky, Sarina turned her back on the hollow inside of the white cold flesh deprived of fluid that once made it once seem rosy and warm, the life. Behind her it lay, mangled and defiled on the grey black asphalt of the backstreet framed by stained black sandstone.

He wanted it that way; he smiled as Sarina, the preying mantis, devoured her once love; for to him he had to end when the love started to run out. Once their hearts span the same way, now they had started to drift; he could not bare to face this night alone, the very threat always brought tears to his soft blue eyes. His ethereal soul cast out of its human shell writhed in the pain of transcendent march to the lands of eternal, turning back to see the blood flower she left on his dry, lifeless ribcage.

She found it hard to do, now with a crimson stain to her otherwise colourless silk undergarments. Strange pains that ran back and fourth inside her ancient, un-aging skull; sending a headless feeling of spinning semi-euphoria that came in its aftermath. Tasting those whose hearts beat solely for you, and make yours beat again with long-lost warmth was always the sweetest pleasure, for the greatest pleasure is also the greatest pain. Nirvana until the journey up the mountain leaves one falling off its cliff face. And as the rule states “what goes up, must come down”; Icarus had come near the sun, her descent was immanent.

He was gone…the feeling of emptiness like the empty cadaver behind, torn apart by her love had entered her mind. She had destroyed him. He is no more

But he was mortal, it would have happened anyway

The thought of it all ran through her head, the euphoria lost. A clinging of longing, lusting, wanting once more to cradle his delicate living, breathing body; the thought moved down from her head into the torso and down the rest of her body in an electric jolt that brought a wave of loosing the warmth that had temporarily been given, this was her feeling, she would give anything to loose its iron grip on her body.

Now cold; she wiped a tear away. Sarina never died, she always lived along in a changing world. How long had it had been since she had been removed from constant threat of death she did not know. It was all a faint, light blue and white dream; in the canvass of her eternal sleepwalk that caressed her pale feet.

Now there was pain. It would be many years until another defribulator could come and turn this curse eternal agony into a blessing of temporary bliss. The tears that started to freeze her cheeks by the frozen July breeze kept flowing in a potential hazard of freezing her eyes. A scream left her newly bright crimson lips connected to the swelling reds of new blood flowing. A scream, a prayer to her forgotten god:

“Lord, help me”

“Lord, I beg of you”

“Lord, let me sleep”

“mein Leib und Seele freuen sich in dem lebendigen Gott”*

“Kyrie eleison”

“Libera me, Domine, de morte aeterna”†

There was a heavy dust that blew around the backstreet as the thin rays of life-giving sun entered, and the faint sound of an approaching siren. The high-pitched sound of the small, pretty little birds faded in after the coda, the conductor bows and the audience leaves.


AMEN



* From Johannes Brahms’ “A German Requiem” translates to “my heart and flesh crieth out for the living God.”

† Lines from different parts of  Gabriel Fauré’s ‘Requiem’ translates to
“Lord have mercy”
and
“Deliver me, Lord from eternal death”